Reminders, tips for men ahead of Valentine's Day

CHARLOTTE, NC (WBTV) - Valentine's Day is almost here. But guys, if you're thinking you can wait until the day of to get those cards, flowers, and candies - you better think again.

First, let's make this perfectly clear: the pressure's on you according to Laurie Berzack, a relationship expert with Carolinas Matchmaker. She says, "Yes, totally!"

"It is unfair, I will admit," Julie Wadley, a relationship expert with Eli Simone added. "It is unfair that Valentine's Day really falls on the men's shoulders."

Guys, don't think for one minute that simple flowers, candy, and the card are going to do it.

"Like candy is literally five bucks. You went to CVS and you went to Harris Teeter and you got me on the way to work like it was just like an errand, you know what I mean," Wadley says. "It's more like an obligation. That's what flowers and candies mean to me. And when you think I'm OK with that, oh, you think that I'm an obligation, you just don't care at all... no thought process."

Not that flowers, candy, and cards can't be part of a bigger picture.

According to Berzack, "Women want to feel deeply connected with the men in their lives. They want to feel like their guy is thinking about them all the time."

So make sure you know what your sweetheart really wants. I asked several people what they really wanted for Valentine's Day.

"To be treated special, unlike any other day during the week," Kara Vincent said.

Emory Smith had a different idea. "Probably a day of relaxation. Nothing too big, nothing too crazy. I'm a minimalist, if you will."

Angela Thompkins answered, "Peace and quiet! We have children... peace and quiet."

Jesse McEntire told me she wanted something else. "A new fishing rod."

Well, to each their own!

The bottom line, according to Berzack, "I think that the fallacy of Valentine's Day is that it's the one time of the year where you really say how much you love someone or show someone that you love someone. I think the key is, you know, of course, every day should be Valentine's Day and you treat your partner with so much love and respect and companionship and what not, but this is just like a little bit of the pinnacle of the year where you just treat them extra special on that day and make 'em feel good."

Here's something helpful for you guys - there are what are called "five love languages," according to Berzack, and you would do well to learn more about them:

  • Words of Affirmation
  • Acts of Service
  • Receiving Gifts
  • Quality Time
  • Physical Touch

You can learn more about them all, just check out the Carlolinas Matchmaker website or the Eli Simone site and you may very well have the best Valentine's Day you've ever had.

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